This is a picture of me from, I dunno, 6 or 7 years ago. I want to look like this again. Mom had this picture, which I'd never seen before, so I copied it.
Here's why this is relevant now. It's another attempt at inspiration. After a shitload of hassle (I'll save that for when I'm not as tired), I was diagnosed with arthritis in my frakkin' foot. On the TOP of my foot no less. It remains consistently red and swollen and painful. Some days, particularly mornings, I can barely walk.
It occurred to me that maybe God was once again trying to get my attention. He tried fibro (which would have benefitted from weight loss) and I blew right past. Then there's weight watchers at work, which I've been blowing off. And a doctor willing to work with me on my weight - whom I've been disappointing. Maybe God finally facepalmed and decided to hit me with something that, the troubles that surround it are so directly affected by how much weight I carry, I can't ignore.
Anyway, I pretty much said as much during the "joys and concerns" sharing part of choir practice tonight. Including the statement that I need to "Pull my head out of my butt" about this. (Thank heavens I'm a heretical Methodist and not a fundie, although I at least refrained from saying "ass," which was my first instinct.)
The music director dialed my language back a bit when he lead the group prayer. But hey, I've got a room full of prayerful singers on my side now. That can't hurt, right?
Be patient with me please, God. I may be a spoiled little pissant, but I really am listening.
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